Jokes

Two playgrounds are on either side of the road... So, why did the children cross the road? To get to the other slide.

Why did the hen cross the road? To find the rooster.

Q: Why did the tofu cross the road? A: To prove he wasn't chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the chicken newspaper. You get it? I don't get it either. I get The Daily Herald.

Why did the ostrich cross the desert? To stick his head in the sand!

Why was the chicken scared to cross the road? Because there was a KFC on the other side....

Why did the turtle cross the road? To get into the shell station. Why did the turkey cross the road twice? To prove it wasn't chicken. Why did the rabbit cross the road? To get to the hare station.

Why did the ghost cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did Adele cross the road? To say "Hello" from the other side!

I took my daughter to the dentist for a checkup. After a thorough examination, the dentist told her she needed a filling. After removing the cavity, the dentist asked her what kind of filling would she like. She replied, "Chocolate, please."

My friend felt she needed to go to the dentist since her front tooth was chipped. I asked her if it bothered her having it chipped like that? She replied, “I am only concerned when I smile.” I said, "Well in that case, there really is no need to go.”

"Open wider," requested the dentist, as he began his examination of the patient. "Good God!" he said startled. "You've got the biggest cavity I've ever seen... the biggest cavity I've ever seen." "Okay Doc!" replied the patient. "I'm scared enough without you saying something like that twice." "I didn't!" said the dentist. "That was the echo."

Be TRUE to your teeth... Or they will be FALSE to you!

What did the dinosaur eat after the dentist pulled his tooth? The dentist!

A bear without any teeth is a GUMMY BEAR.

"I came in to make an appointment with the dentist," said the man to the receptionist. "I'm sorry sir," she replied. "He's out right now, but..." "Thank you," interrupted the obviously nervous prospective patient. "When will he be out again?"

What helps keep your teeth together? What else, Toothpaste!

What do you call 1st President George Washington's false teeth? PRESI-DEN-TURES!

Brandon: "Why did the doughnut go to the dentist?" Kaleb: "I don't know, tell me." Brandon: "He needed a filling!"

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don’t worry it will take just five minutes. Patient: And how much will it cost? Dentist: It’s $90.00. Patient: $90.00 for just a few minutes work??? Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like?

A sign posted on the door of a local dental office read: "We do Fillings, Cleanings and Extractions ONLY! That's the TOOTH, the whole TOOTH, and nothing but the TOOTH... so help me God."

At what time do most people go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty!

Dentist: "How did you lose your three teeth?" Patient: "My wife prepared the pancakes and they were very hard to eat." Dentist: "Then you could have refused to eat them." Patient: "I did refused to eat them. Hence, I lost my three teeth."

I met a Russian Dentist and his name was Anesthesia. I thought this could be love. Sadly, I felt nothing.

The patient goes to the dentist and says, "I have yellow teeth, what should I do?" The dentist replies, "Wear a brown tie."

Why did the computer go to the Dentist? Because it had a Blue-Tooth.

Steve phoned his dentist when he received a huge bill. "I'm shocked!" he complained. "This is three times what you normally charge." "Yes, I know," said the dentist. "But you yelled so loud, you scared away two other patients."

Everywhere I went I kept hearing about BLUETOOTH... So I finally went to my dentist and asked, "What's the best way to prevent it?"

My dental hygienist retired, after 55 years of working... All she got was a lousy plaque.

Teeth said to Tongue: "If I press down on you just a little, you will get cut." Tongue replied: "If I misuse one word, all 32 of you will come out."