Jokes
Browse and search jokes.
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Fruit Flies Like
Time flies like an arrow but fruit flies like a banana.
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Anti-Picketing
I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.
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No One Knew, Until
No one knew she had a dental implant, until it came out in conversation.
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Good Ole Mississippi
Interviewer: How do you spell Mississippi? Dumb Guy: Which one? The river or the state?
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Always Test Them
Why did Gus drive his pickup truck over the side of the cliff? He wanted to test his new air brakes.
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Sounds Like A Good Job
Slim walks into his local post office and notices a new sign on the wall: MAN WANTED FOR ROBBERY IN MONTANA "Gosh!" he says, "If only that job was in Texas, I'd take it!"
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No, Not Barry Bonds
I don't know much about Barry Bonds ... I'm more familiar with bail bonds.
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A Ringing In Your Ear
Did you ever have a constant ringing in your ear? I finally got the divorce.
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Perfect Attendance
The only time I had perfect attendance ... was when I was in jail.
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Overqualified Dancer
I tried out for belly dancing today... they said I was overqualified.
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Cheetah's Dilema
Why can a Cheetah not hide? Because it's always spotted!
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Line Dancing Addiction
Did you hear about the young lady who was addicted to line dancing? They put her in a two step program.
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Bad Zoo
I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it... it was a shih-tzu.
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The Cold Politician
It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
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History Fact
What is Napoleon's favorite part of the chicken? Answer... The Boney-Part!
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The Tired Bicycle
Q: Why do bicycles fall over? A: Because they're two-tired!
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The Loudest Sport
Q: What is the loudest sport? A: Tennis, because everyone raises a racquet.
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Paranoia Meet Delusional
Help me! The paranoid delusional people are after me!!!
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Reverse Psychology
I'm writing a book about reverse psychology. Please don't buy it.
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Dinosaur Test
What did the dinosaur get on its Maths test? Nothing, it got an Extinction!
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Teenage Marriage Proposal
Q: How does a teenage schoolboy propose marriage? A: YOUR HAVING A WHAT!?!
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Men and Their Singles Bars
Q: What is the one thing that most men at a singles bars have in common? A: They are all married.
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Cat Cleaning Etiquette
Q: How do you know when your cat's done cleaning himself? A: He's smoking a cigarette.
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Irish Dancing
Q: How did Irish dancing get started? A: Too much Guinness and not enough restrooms!
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5 out of 3
I think fractions are difficult. In fact, 5 out of 3 people struggle with them.
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Never Tell Jokes About the Unemployed
I tell many jokes, but they are never about unemployed people. Those jokes just don't work.
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Do You Smell Carrots?
One snowman asks another, "Do you smell carrots?"
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Barbie
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
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A Bartender
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
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One Boat to Another
Q: What did one boat say to the other? A: Are you up for a little row-mance?