desert-island Jokes
Browse jokes in this category.
Now That's A Bad Day
You know you are having a bad day when your twin sister forgets your birthday.
That's A Good Question
“Does a man-eating shark eat women too?”
Amphibian Love
You've got to kiss a lot of frogs before you find the handsome prince... But he probably isn't going to be interested in some frog-kisser.
Breaking Without Touching
What can you break without touching? Promise.
Ruler Worms
What do you get if worms ruled the earth? Global Warming.
Cavities In Your Dentures
“Can you get cavities in your dentures if you use too much artificial sweetener?”
An Entire Chess Set
“Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawnshop?”
Remember Back
Remember back when we were kids, and every time it was below zero outside they closed school? Me neither.
Is That Even Possible?
“How can someone ‘draw a blank?’”
No One Knows the Words
“Do hummingbirds hum because they don’t know the words?”
Who Likes Graveyard Shift?
“Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?”
Everyone Has It!
Everyone has photographic memory! Difference is some do not have any film.
My Money Talks
Money talks, but all mine ever says is, "Good-bye."
Lunchtime MVP
Bacon was definitely the
first-round draft pick in the BLT... No one’s building a sandwich around lettuce!
Lost and Probably Not Found
I have lost my mind! And I'm pretty sure my kids took it!
Got What It Takes
I.R.S.... We have got what it takes, to take what you have got!
Sole Ownership
Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly?
Constant Tardiness
She is always late... Her ancestors arrived on the June Flower!
Lost In Thought
I just got lost in deep thought... It was unfamiliar territory.
Live By the Sword
Those who live by the sword, get shot by those who don't.
Depth Perception
I'm not fat or overweight, I'm just easier to see.
Productivity
I'm great at multi-tasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
Distance of Flight
If God had intended us to fly... he would have made it easier to get to the airport.
What Is Husband Called?
If a wife is called the 'better half', then what is a husband called?
Smartest State
Why is Alabama the smartest state? Because it has 4 A's and one B!
The Pigeon and the Statue
Accept that some days you’re the pigeon, and some days you’re the statue!
New Hearing Aid
I just put my new hearing aid in... I can even hear my thoughts now.
The Look
I was going to give him a nasty look, but nature beat me to it.
Did You Ever Notice
Did you ever notice when you put the two words "The" and "IRS" together, it spells "THEIRS"?
What's In Between
When humans are young, they are pushed around in strollers... When they are old, they are pushed around in wheelchairs... In between, they are just pushed around...