I bumped into my mate in the pub last night who was looking a bit glum, so I asked him what was up. “Well, I can’t afford anything anymore so I’ve had to cancel my golf and gym memberships, my Sky TV package and have to cut down on fags to 20 a week” he sighed. “Because of the recession?” I asked. “No” he replied. “I’ve been forced off benefits and been made to get a job.”