Mirror, mirror on the wall, Should I really shave my hairy balls? If I don’t, she’ll surely bitch, She doesn’t care how much I’ll itch? Take the razor and lather up, (Gawd that bitch is so corrupt) Don’t she care that I could slip? Shave my balls - and cut off my dick? Easy now - hands don’t shake, She’ll call me “Stumpy” with one mistake. Pubes in her teeth she really can’t bear, If I want some head - get ridda the hair. So I shave my balls all nice and slick, Did it up nice - without one nick! “Feel ’em baby - they’re so smooth!” “Take off your clothes - get in the groove!” She looks at me from our little bed, “I’m sleepy, Baby - ain’t givin’ no head!” She rolls on over - and gives me her back, I’m so pissed off - I’m about to crack! Next day it’s breakfast in the sheets, I spoon her bites which she gladly eats. And I must confess I think it’s fair, That her omelette was made with pubic hair!