Some of the Stupidest Things Lawyers and Witnesses Actually Said In a Court of Law ~~~~~~~~~~ * Accused, (Defending His Own Case:) “Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?” ( The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.) ~~~~~~~~~~ * Lawyer: “What is your date of birth?” * Witness: “July 15th.” * Lawyer: “What year?” * Witness: “Every year.” ~~~~~~~~~~ * Lawyer: “Can you tell us what was stolen from your house?” * Witness: “There was a rifle that belonged to my father that was stolen from the hall closet.” * Lawyer: “Can you identify the rifle?” * Witness: “Yes. There was something written on the side of it.” * Lawyer: “And what did the writing say?” * Witness: “‘Winchester’!” ~~~~~~~~~~ * Lawyer: “What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?” * Witness: “Gucci sweats and Reeboks.”