An old man enters a confessional and proudly exclaims, "Father, I have to tell you what happened to me last night. I'm 90 years old, and I made love to two 18-year-old women for eight hours!" The stern priest replies, "That is a sin. I will have to give you a penance." "Father, you can't give me a penance." "Why not?" "Because I'm Jewish." The perplexed Father asks, "Then why are you telling me?" "I'm telling everyone!"