Just How Dry is it in Texas? Here in Texas It’s so dry that the Baptists are starting to baptize by sprinkling, the Methodists are using wet-wipes, the Presbyterians are giving out rain-checks, and the Catholics are praying for the wine to turn back into water. I was visiting online with a buddy in Austin and he said he’d killed a mosquito that was carrying a canteen. And heat? A friend in southwest Texas told me the chicken farmers are giving the chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard-boiled eggs. Man, it’s been hot and dry! Last week, here in Stephenville , a man said he saw a fire hydrant bribing a dog. In Proctor Lake, another friend caught a 20 lb catfish that had ticks on it! Man, it’s been hot and dry!